Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Cosmo Jones Crime Smasher

Hi everyone! Before I ever blogged or reviewed TV shows I use to review old black and white movies on YouTube! I'm working on new TV reviews now but in the meantime here's one of the first video reviews I ever did! (6th one to be precise! From way back in the summer of 2010!) I hope you enjoy a younger black and white me!



It's been on YouTube for over a year with only getting 38 views!

46 comments:

  1. Nice review!
    And nice haircut by the way.;)

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  2. This is so awesome man, I never knew you were doing this stuff back then! You're just as good as ever, this is class, I'm not even kidding. Wish I'd known you'd been around for this long, I seriously do

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  3. I love the helmet in the background. Odd comment but hey. I like this, and it does set me up for what you look like without a beard. It got 38 viewers in a year? I commend you for not giving up and doing what you love and have fun doing. I think the black guys IQ was too high if he's a stereotypical racial stereotype. I did enjoy it and was happy, and I love the final little touch at the end where you say you are owned by the mob. It's the little touches that make things great.

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  4. Where do you find all the time to watch what you critique? You have so much more patience than I do!

    :)

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  5. Well, shit who da fuck is dis? The "Old Timey Movie Reviewer"? Bersercules could crush you with his beard!

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  6. @R Thanks! And I'm glad you like the hair cut cause although this video is old its what I look like right now!

    @Lexsa Your welcome!

    @YeamieWaffles Thanks! I'm glad you enjoy it! I realize I should have said sooner in my blog about my years of YouTube videos but I was saving it for Christmas time!

    @Mark I like the helmet too! I were it in one of the reviews! (I'll be posting it soon!) I would have considered giving up but I love doing it! So my first priority is have fun! Second is be successful!
    The black guys IQ is based on my best guess using my real world understanding of IQs! I didn't wanna exagerate his! So I made it so hes just above being retarded! (which is 75 and under!)
    (did you notice the Leapord Dalphin line in this that predates the Leapord Dolphin line in Catweazle? I wonder how often I can say that legitly say tht line in my reviews!)
    I'm glad you liked the mob comment! I do that in all the ol' timey reviews! It started in my first review (of the movie She Demons) when I wrote that I am owned by Satan! And I dicided to do it in every review! If thoughts little touches are what makes videos great, then I'm great! (and egotistical!) cause I do a lot of that kind of stuff! If you watch all my reviews in order you'll see references in them from others! Heck this video has a reference in it to the next video! (god I'm such a dork!)

    @The Accidental Somebody I have lots of time on my hands (haven't had a full time job in years!) And not only do I have patience but I have drive aswell! As a kid I learnt patience by not watching much TV and spending a lot of time drawing comics! When you learn to slowly tell a story drawing one panel at a time you learn patience!

    @Henry Yes I Bersercules would crush the Ol' Timey Movie Reviewer! But not with my beard! But with the fifty or so pounds I have on him!

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  7. Wow that was soo long ago. a year and a few months hahaha sure didn't take besurcles long to assume control. That guy seems a bit dated anyway. Black and white, pffft..haha

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  8. 38 views? Maybe if it was something uh.. less bland? Lol, no, really though! It took like 2 minutes before it started getting interesting.

    ALSO, beard suits you, man.

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  9. @Pat Hatt Yup black and white is quite dated! But I must say I love it more than colour!

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  10. @The Accidental Somebody (again) I hope you read this! I can't comment on your blog! It has some weird comment section attached to it! I don't know how to use it!

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  11. @D4 Your probably right! I should have had nude girls and explotions!
    I liked the first two minutes of my review! They really capture the movie! And mock it! But I guess my love for old black and white movies and slow build ups arn't shared by everyone!

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  12. I noticed the helmet in the background too. When it got to the bit about racial stereotypes I thought "Holy Christ, he's gonna say it, he's gonna say it." And then you did. You look so young here too. And no beard, I almost wet myself. Bersercules without a beard is like Batman without a Boy Wonder, it's just not right.

    I went to your channel at about 4:00 a.m. thinking I could get a sneak peak at what you were going to post, but ya foiled me ya bastard. This wasn't up. Shit, I could have gone to bed.

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  13. @Anne We'll Leapord my Dolphine! I'm glad you liked the line! I actually look young when ever I remove my beard! I'm glad my naked face amused you so! And since I burnt it off in the last Bersercules review it wont be around for a while! But like when Robin died: an new one will eventually take its place!

    Sorry about you waiting to get a sneek peek! But you'll never find this on my channel anyway! Its on my old channel! (along with seventeen other old movie reviews!) So feel free to check them out! I'll be posting some of them in the coming week on this blog! I wont be making too many videos before christmas! But I will be blogging a lot!

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  14. Your style is angry/eager and even when the subject matter is slightly bland you still drag the viewer in and dazzle them, as a fellow beardie we must stick together!

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  15. @The Angry Lurker I like your assessment on my stlye! Angry/eager! Sounds correct! Thanks! And yes we beardies must stick together! Others just don't understand!

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  16. Awww lil beardless babyface bersercules! Haha only joking.

    The reviews aren't the same without the bersercules intro and arm movement!

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  17. @Sub-Radar-Mike They're also not the same cause of the subject matter and the whole being in black and white thing! I hope you enjoy them anyway!

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  18. Nah you aren't a dork, and if you are you're one of the good ones. You take pride in your work and you do what you do well.

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  19. @Mark Now a days it seems like taking pride in your work and doing it the best you can is the definition of dork!

    @Interwebs Fails I'm glad I've inspired you to watch this crappy movie! I know I loved watching it!

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  20. If that is the case we need more dorks. Lots more dorks.

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  21. Look a bit less berserk without the beard.

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  22. The B&W makes it a stylized event.

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  23. Hey now. The Mighty Boosh was fucking amazing, and that was based on a radio show!

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  24. I just came back from Youtube. Sorry it took me so long to get there, but I was burning one with the hubby and watching Voyager on Netflix. Then I remembered. Feck, I've got to get to Youtube and comment on Bersercules vid. But then the pizza boy arrived and then I ate some nacho's. It wasn't until I was opening the jar of peanut butter that I remembered again. Anyway, I'm trippin balls now man, but I got it done.

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  25. Lol, old school...no beard. Awesome. lol

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  26. lol yeah i know the dangers, and damn you look like that king of queens guy in that vid. and hell yeah, white hot on young tanned chicks. fuck year!

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  27. I really like that helmet on the bookcase behind you.

    xo

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  28. I do not recognize you without beard!

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  29. Wow you look real different from now.

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  30. I have never seen this film, and thanks to your review, I never will!

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  31. thanks -- i've been looking for more bland movies haha

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  32. From being a gentleman and a scholar, you turned into a berserk demigod of awesome beardness. I never would have guessed this kind of transformation.

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  33. I like the new beard look, old movie is old!

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  34. @Mark I concur.

    @Heaven. Don't worry! It grows back!

    @JDC The beard is the source of my insanity!

    @Mocheliero Thanks!

    @Copyboy I do always feel fansy in black and white!

    @heddin But thats British! They're always amusing!

    @Anne So peanut butter reminds you of me? Cool!

    @kwile Glad you liked it!

    @Bart I wonder if there are dangers in doing a white haired girl? Hey maybe you could get a job doing that!

    @Mich Thanks! I spent an hour designing what the background would look like! (and I made the books by painting over books and writing my own titles!)

    @Shaw Thanks! I clean up really nicely!

    @Orang3 Maybe its not me! (it is)

    @R.gers The beard makes me!

    @JOutlaw I'm glad I could help!

    @j. littlejohn Who isn't!

    @Lord Phrozen It is quite a change! Thats the differcnce a beard makes! (or did I just sell my soul to Jezzer Hora?!)

    @Natural One But is old lame?

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  35. Sometimes you have to toil in obscurity to emerge as a media hero. I recommend the book Iron John, it's about mans journey, and really the closest thing I've ever read to "men's studies" as opposed to "women's studies"

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  36. @convictus Your totally right! I will look up the book it sounds like it would be a good read!

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  37. I thought you turned like this after burning your beard in the Justice League tv series review. But then I read the description and my mind was blown.

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  38. @To Tipota I did turn like this after burning my beard in the Justice League TV series review, I just also looked like this before I made that video!

    @T. Rogers Thomas Thanks! Its my pride and joy!

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